‘Hoe!’
‘I beg your pardon’
‘Just saving what I see’
‘Kiss my arse’
‘Look who’s all touchy’
‘My arse, your face’
‘Nice.’
‘Oh grow up’
‘Perhaps we should start again’
‘Quickly before I stab you with something’
‘Raking it all over again am I?’
‘Sometimes I really dislike you’
‘Touche’
‘Unless you’re going to buy something, can we just go please’
‘Vases, great big stone garden vases’
‘Why…?’
‘eXpecting something more masculine?’
‘You can buy whatever you want’
‘Zebras! Huge plastic zebras’
‘And if you get one you’ll never get back in the house’
‘But it would great in the front garden’
‘Cock’
‘Don’t start that again – it’s retail time’
‘Everyone thinks you’re a dick’
‘Fork you’
‘Going now… Bye’

The Citric Adventure
Water’s cold when it slaps ye in the face, wettin’ ye features and dragging ye into its arms. Xanthic fish darted about me, evadin’ me splashy bubbles. Yellow they were,