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Shankanography – the Study of Angry Verse

  Twitter has proven to be a most entertaining medium for verse. I’m enjoying concisely expressing my annoyance in just 140 characters. Often these poems will have abbreviations which I’ve rectified here. I also take great pleasure in giving them simple titles, long after I’ve forgotten what the poem was inspired by. Usually it’s other people. Not you though, never you. I dislike management babble and those who insist on speaking vapidly without humour. I like nonsense though, but it’s got to be good-natured, interesting and imaginative. Otherwise… well poems ensue. If you fancy you can follow @shankanalia on Twitter too, or just wait for the ‘collected works’ to turn up here.




I’m over here,
You’re over there,
I can’t see you.
But I hear you,
All the time.
How can we meet?
How can I touch you?
How can I stop you talking?

How I long for a day,
When I go out to play,
And return with the larks and the dew,
And the blood on my blade,
And the marks on the yew,
Where I found you.

String Bag
Let’s all go on a munt-hunt,
Track down a mugly moose.
I found a mountain munter,
And shot it with my gun.
Now I feel like a man
Plus shame.

Population Control
Kicking Nazis in the nads,
Makes me feel awful glad,
Your Aryan sperm,
And their crippled tails.
Swim back up you,
Curl up and die,
In never-dad.

Strategic Oversight
Don’t plan.
Won’t plan.
Can’t plan.
Ought to plan.
Might not fail.
Legend of the fail.
Your admin is weak old man.
Don’t plan.
Won’t plan.
Can’t plan.
The Vision
Leaky-faced word spout,
Sub-verbal dribblings,
Down your fat
Greasy face,
Frictionless verbiage
Pooling on the floor.
Health and safety mind hazard.

Say What You Think
Murmuring moron
Mumbling mimbler
Your fat lips
Slap together
Sticky smack
Murmuring moron
On your subvocalised
Brain gribble

Road Beer
Better disposed to London when en-rummed.
The shanking urge declines.
Your rudeness interests me.
Maybe you are human,
Despite your face.

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