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Shankanolalia – The Sensation of Being Verse-Shanked

While it’s always pleasant to be prolific I’m actually a little worried by how much anger I’ve been leaking into the internet. So it may as well increase with another bumper collection of mean-spirited Twitter verse from @Shankanalia. Again, I feel I should defend some of my harsher words here and point you to the real source of blame which is definitely not me…. It’s work, it’s the continuous frustration of dealing with other people who bewilderingly do not do things in exactly the same way that I do. Oh, and our absymal tools. Oh woe is a computer purchased in an ill-considered national contract. Sigh. Enjoy/despair.

Angry Tom
Get opened
Get cutted
Be an eviscerine
Cos I’m a shank machine

Infinite Stupidity
If I cut off your face
Took a peek in your holes
Would I find you inside
Or a tiny small person
Whose face just might hide An infinite regression of homunculi

O so bright o so chirpy
But your life is a sham
Make polite conversation
Counting out pills
O so bleak full of pity
Take out your big knife

Old and Still Dull
Your ceaseless prattle
Your endless moans
Do you hear the rattle
Inside your bones?

Sad man sitting
Red Bull and cigarette
Sad man thinking
Lonely and heart upset
Sad man hanging
Adrenaline and anoxia

Prison Sweet
They sent me down cos I cut ya
Got raped every day cos I cut ya
But I don’t care cos I cut ya
Cos I cut ya you’ll never fiiiiiind love.

Your keyboard is my closest weapon
Stabby stabby stabby eyeholes
Broken jag of keyboard
Buried in your skull
Eyeholes full of letters
Alphanumeric sight unseen
Stabby stabby..

Why oh why Mr ‘Puter can’t you work?
If you can’t work then I can’t work too
Mr ‘Puter don’t you know I need you
Guess I’ll just go home now

Don’t Talk No Proper
Said the boy to the man
You ain’t got nuffin ya get me
Said the man to the boy
I got your face on CCTV
Said the boy to the man
Ya get me man

Ugly Is In The Beholder
Oh lady
Lady with a warthog face
Oh lady
Lady you scare me
Please don’t look at me
Oh lady
Can’t you euthanise for me?
Oh lady

Criminal (stupidity)
Broke into JD Sports to fight the man
Just to show em we can
The shutter defeated us
Come back tomorrow when
We can shoplift instead

Regret – a Gamble
Me an dese lads broke
Inta Ladbrokes
Dint ave no money
Orses for courses innit tho
What ve odds of dat?
Shouda done maffs, ya get me.

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2 thoughts on “Shankanolalia – The Sensation of Being Verse-Shanked

  1. I’m both amused and a little frightened. Still, I suppose it’s good you have an outlet!

    I leave you with this haiku:

    Scary rage-poems
    They doth angry up the blood
    Spare me, o Shanky!

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