Well sort of – not really. Fuck ’em, they’re usually terrible.
On this occasion they’ve actually delivered a first class letter the day after I posted it. Colour me stunned, in many ways.
As I said yesterday I finally got up the nerve to post the letter to my Mum that explains well, everything. I didn’t get much sleep, and figured I’d be much the same way till I hear from her. I heard from Mum today. She sent me a text message, which is by far my favourite mode of communication – it allows the recipient to read the message when they want, and respond in their own time, re-read the message and so on. Those are all things I needed to do.
I was at work and spotted the message and the first line and realised immediately I wasn’t ready to read it. So I left it for half an hour, till I found a convenient slice of time. It’s exactly the message I hoped to get. I can’t repeat it entirely here because it’s private, but there were a whole bunch of key words that felt right: “thank you for trusting me”. I feel accepted and loved. I also feel really weird, totally numb and brain fried. I haven’t had time to deal with knowing that the people who I wanted to know, do know. If that makes sense then you’re a step ahead of me.
Much to do right now, but I have people to go and see before I have time to figure out what I now want to say back to Mum. Hopefully I’ll get to crash properly tonight and get my head together. Thanks Mum, I love you too.
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