Follow Captain Pigheart on WordPress.com

Ensnuggled

It had been my considerable misfortune to share a snug with a trio of post-adolescent pre-intelligent vermin. Cheerfully engaged in their inane banter, the soaring pitches of their execrably formed discourses began to inflame those sensitive portions of my soul.

To be frank, I was overdue in sating that part of myself most comfortable when extracting the kidneys from some wailing street creature. Indeed, I was only passing the time before catching my train to the city (where I aimed to indulge my cravings without arousing suspicion).

It was only by chance that I was seated so close to these purveyors of prattle with their relentless stream of failed similies and repetitious drooling.

To gain myself a moment’s peace I withdrew my favourite lady-filleter and placed it on the table with a well-practiced thunk. I discovered that this, in combination with an avuncular smile was sufficient to settle the wretches into a nervous silence; perfectly adequate for my drinking needs.

Though it might delay my journey, there was an alley with convenient drainage at the rear of the tavern. All I now needed was to lure one of the mis-brained youths outside. However, at that precise moment my guinea pig began to vibrate alarmingly.

Read More of Franklyn de Gashe

Similar Stuff

The Primeval Entertainment

Oh the horror of humanity. Their dreadful lowing as they mimble incompetently. The noisome clots of mankind, reeking enthusiastically. Their hateful prattle drove me to a killing spree. But all

Read More »
De Gashe – Origins

The son of an offal miner and a milliner, Franklyn soon learned that people are like gloves stuffed with organs. If you remove the organs, you can wear the glove.

Read More »

Share This Thing

Leave a Reply